Kanyes Apology IN CAPS OF COURSE

Apparently Kanye was blizted last night off of Henny.. ick.. Kanye stick to Boones it brings out the love in everyone... Heres this tool bloggin in Caps and sayin I SOOOOOOOOOWRRRY...

“I’M SOOOOO SORRY TO TAYLOR SWIFT AND HER FANS AND HER MOM. I SPOKE TO HER MOTHER RIGHT AFTER AND SHE SAID THE SAME THING MY MOTHER WOULD’VE SAID. SHE IS VERY TALENTED! I LIKE THE LYRICS ABOUT BEING A CHEERLEADER AND SHE’S IN THE BLEACHERS! …………………… I’M IN THE WRONG FOR GOING ON STAGE AND TAKING AWAY FROM HER MOMENT!…………….. BEYONCE’S VIDEO WAS THE BEST OF THIS DECADE!!!! I’M SORRY TO MY FANS IF I LET YOU GUYS DOWN!!!! I’M SORRY TO MY FRIENDS AT MTV. I WILL APOLOGIZE TO TAYLOR 2MRW. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD!!!! EVERYBODY WANNA BOOOOO ME BUT I’M A FAN OF REAL POP CULTURE!!! NO DISRESPECT BUT WE WATCHIN’ THE SHOW AT THE CRIB RIGHT NOW CAUSE … WELL YOU KNOW!!!! I’M STILL HAPPY FOR TAYLOR!!!! BOOOYAAAWWWW!!!! YOU ARE VERY VERY TALENTED!!! I GAVE MY AWARDS TO OUTKAST WHEN THEY DESERVED IT OVER ME… THAT’S WHAT IT IS!!!!!!! I’M NOT CRAZY YALL, I’M JUST REAL. SORRY FOR THAT!!! I REALLY FEEL BAD FOR TAYLOR AND I’M SINCERELY SORRY!!! MUCH RESPECT!!!!!”

Reading this gives me a headache or it might be the fact I was drinking wine out of a box yesterday afternoon... Im going with the rant... never blame the booze

Kanye should apologize for living and breathing..... His "apology" just makes him look worse.

image via mtv.com

Lindsay Lohan To Pose Naked In Playboy

According SFGate, Lindsay Lohan was reportedly offered $900,000 to pose naked for Playboy. According to reports to has turned it down... well she does have 2 million worth of jewerly.. oh wait that was stolen (cough cough bullshit)

I dont know what Playboy was thinking offer her 900k.. I need to have a talk with them because they know nothing about negotations with a crackie.. Start off by offering her some blow and some booze and when she says no again offer some crack Im sure she will jump on the offer

Its nice to see Lohan wearing a bra finally.... Im ending on a positive note

And From The Enquirer...

First OK! broke the story and now the Enquirer is chiming in on the demise of Angie and Brad (Jenny is cackling right now with her 10 cats)

Get clean or get out - that’s the stinging ultimatum Angelina Jolie issued to Brad Pitt after hearing that the Inglourious Basterd had secretly shared hashish with a celeb pal while his children were asleep in bed, say sources.

“Stop boozing and smoking drugs or check into rehab!” she told him, according to insiders.

A self-confessed stoner when married to Jennifer Aniston, Brad had promised Angelina his drug-using days were over after he became a dad - and she believed him.

On the cover he looks more like a boozebag ( I love him more) then a pothead and its from the Enquirer so its gotta be true!

I will say I was listening to Howard Stern and Tarantino outted him about other drugs on the show so that probably didnt go over to well and you know he gets the good shit from Maddox

Oh I miss the old days when Angie wore vials of blood and made out with her brother... It was all less complicated

Melanie Griffith in Rehab

Melanie's rep tells Star Magazine that she has checked into Cirque Lodge in Utah. Her rep said, "She is there to reinforce her commitment to stay healthy. This is part of a routine plan that was designed between her and her doctors years ago.. cough.. cough .. bullshit...

But a source said, "The reason Melanie checked in was her husband was demanding that she get clean and sober. He told her that if she didn't get the help she needed it would be the end of their marriage."

If Cirque Lodge sounds familiar its where Linds went to clean up her act... yeah that worked.. Hopefully it will work for Melanie

FREE ICE CREAM ON YOUR BARFDAY - CLICK HERE

Personally on my birthday I drown my happiness in Boones,Sparks and pork rinds (its my birthday so shut it)but this year Im gonna enjoy some ice cream from Stone Cold Creamery and watch The Golden Girls Marathon on Lifetime...

Oh The Roll and Go....

Mischa Barton on the set of Beautiful Life. As we all know lil Mischa went a bit crazy and spent some time in a fun white jacket hugging herself for about a week and now is back to work some say a bit too soon

Looking at this pic we have the classic hangover look

a. Wet hair - dont bother drying it the sound of the hairdryer intensifies your headache
b. Ciggy and coffee to kill the boozey hangover or to cure it with a little Baileys - it works um so Im told
c. Jackie O glasses - a must have

I always sport Jackie O glasses the night after im out and about because well im a different person and that person you saw the night before may have heave ho'd outside your favorite watering hole after downing a biggie fry and a junior whooper.. That was not me.. It never happened..Im classy! Mistaken identity!!!

BILLY PAAAAAAAAAAAARTIED LIKE A ROCK STAAAH

TMZ says the following drugs were detected in his system: Vicodin, Oxycodone, Xanax, Valium, benzoylecgonine (byproduct of cocaine) and temazepam (anti-anxiety). They also found booze.


I was quite shocked when I read this then again this man could talk and talk and talk ... Now that I think about maybe he was on the boog sug!!! Seriously there is nothing worse then being around a cokey who goes on and on and on about absolutely nothing and then tries to grab at air biscuits in between sentences .. .. At least Billy had a point or at least I think he did... Then again at 3am anything makes sense to me like my neighbor walking outside at night naked


Billys wife released this statement

We are extremely disappointed by the press release released by the Hillsborough County medical examiner's office. We believe it contains speculative conclusions that are frankly unnecessary and tend to obscure the conclusion that Billy suffered from chronic, untreated hypertension, which only demonstrates how important it is to regularly monitor one's health.

Given the hectic nature and pace of Billy's life, especially during the past 10 months of his exhaustive travel across the country, it was not surprising to hear that hypertension was the cause of his death. We were totally unaware of any non prescription drug usage and are actively considering an independent evaluation of the autopsy results.

As those who were close to Billy knew, he had been in chronic pain for more than two years and was about to have his third hip surgery in 18 months. His use of prescription pain medication for his hip condition was guided by his physician and was at recommended usage levels. This has been a very difficult period for our family and we appreciate the respect for our privacy that Billy's many clients, fans and members of the media have extended. We appreciate your continued thoughts and prayers for the family and will not have any immediate comment beyond this statement."

POSH TO BE A GUEST JUDGE ON IDOL

Somewhere right now Paula is downing a bottle of Vicodens and booze after hearing this! Paula wanted more money then what Idol offered to her well now its rumored that Posh.. snoozefest.. will be a guest judge on the show and pick up a cool 236k ... must be nice.. I wonder if Posh's face will move shes had so much botox her face is permantley frozen.. Is she happy? sad? crying? does she cry? I might just tune just for that alone

Im guessing this is how Idol is gonna roll now paying guest judges instead of throwing millions at Paula

Oh yeah cuz Posh has an eye for talent.. Spice Girls need I say more... Now I have that stupid song in my head.. ... If you wanna be my lovaa....

This Weeks In Touch Rag

Oh and here we have Jon Gosselin who is photoshopped with a new layer of fresh skin.. looks like he got spraytann poo mist on his mug - Hohan.. Anwyay here he is doing an interview with In Touch. Jon finally got his balls out of Kates pocketbook( and a good distance away) and decided to have a chat if there was booze involved (which every interview should have) im sure he would of gone into more detail about his sexay times with his new ho and ended every sentence with HOW DO YOU LIKE ME NOW BITCH.. but I digress..

Here are some clips of the interview

Why did she want to break up?I think she initiated the split because she wanted a career. Maybe I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do, and she was going to move on regardless. I said, “Are you sure about this?”

Did you want to work it out?Yes, I asked, “What do I have to do to mend the relationship? What did I do wrong?” I was beating myself up about it. So I read a lot of books about personalities, like The Five Love Languages. Throughout the marriage, I felt like my personality had changed a lot. In December, I went to therapy. I asked Kate to come, but she didn’t want to. She said, “If you have a problem, go fix it.”

When did you and Kate start living separate lives?We went to Utah on January 1. On January 12, she flew back with security and I stayed. That’s when I started to just hang out and meet people, and feel free. Not too many girls, just with my guy friends. I couldn’t do that for nine years. When I came back on the 17th, Kate and I weren’t talking. So I just said, “I’m moving out of the house,” and that was it.

What was your first relationship?Hailey — it started around May. She is the polar opposite of Kate. It’s really different. I feel good about myself and people see my good qualities. I’m not being put down. If I want to go out with my friends, Hailey says, “Oh, go out.” I’m not used to that. I was used to, “No, no, it’s your fault.” Sometimes I ask Hailey permission, like I used to do with Kate, and she says, “You don’t have to ask permission.” I was used to living like that, and now it’s like a breath of fresh air. You can have a balanced relationship but also spend time with your friends.

How did you fall in love with Hailey?We started talking and got along well. I started getting really attracted to her, like, on the phone. She really listened to me and took in what I was saying. Then she came back to her parents’ house in May and I went up to see her. We hit it off. It was great. She is amazing.

Ok yeah I watched the show I'll admit but now he just sounds like poor me.. Call the WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMbulance will ya you could of left at anytime but im sure that paycheck from TLC was keeping you around.. Love how he talks up Hailey he has no idea that shes just using him.. A broken man is easily taken advantage of im shocked he hasnt bought her a car yet or a house im sure thats coming soon go big or go home Hales! Not like I encourage that behavior

Expect Kate to appear on People.. HER SIDE/HER HURT/HER PAIN/HER TURMOIL/.. and her reverse mullets side of the story you know that thing has secrets- trust